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BTExpress
06 November 2005 @ 09:41 pm
20 October 2005 @ 12:59 am
My wife Barbara passed away on October 17, 2005. I miss her a great deal. God rest her soul.
03 September 2005 @ 04:38 pm
…but it seems to me, that most of the bloggers that discuss their
sexual relationships, or have sexually orientated blogs, are women?
(Not that I frequent sexually orientated blogs mind you, well, not very
often anyway.) ;-)
It seems like very few men discuss their sexual relationships as openly as women do. The exceptions do seem to be when their wives also discuss it openly.
Are most men satisfied with their sex lives? (I doubt that.)
Do their partners satisfy their every sexual need? (I doubt that too.)
Is it because women are hornier than men are, or men don’t give them what they need?
Or maybe men are just more inhibited?
Why do you think that is? Or am I wrong?
It seems like very few men discuss their sexual relationships as openly as women do. The exceptions do seem to be when their wives also discuss it openly.
Are most men satisfied with their sex lives? (I doubt that.)
Do their partners satisfy their every sexual need? (I doubt that too.)
Is it because women are hornier than men are, or men don’t give them what they need?
Or maybe men are just more inhibited?
Why do you think that is? Or am I wrong?
31 August 2005 @ 10:27 am
Wait till you here this, I had two women touching my private parts
yesterday. TWO FUCKING WOMEN WERE TOUCHING ME IN MY MOST PRIVATE AREA.
HOT DAMN, I GOT LUCKY. I am not shitting you, it really happened. Yeah,
I know I’m married, but it’s been three years since anyone has touched
my dick, other than me, so as far as I was concerned, I was going to
let it happen. Oh man, two chicks actually taking turns.
No, I wasn’t cheating on my wife, I was having a polyp removed from between my ass and balls. During the initial examination and procedure, they had to move my package to get to the polyp, but they still touched it, so it still counts, right?
I had a doctor’s appointment at the local VA Hospital to have this little thing removed from between my legs and it just so happens, that both the doctor and nurse were women. As far as that goes, the doctor I saw last week who diagnosed it, was also a young lady. She was a resident from a local university. They come to the VA Hospital once a week to help out.
I go into the hospital yesterday and go up to Unit 23. The guy at the desk tells me to sit in the Patient Lounge and someone will come and get me. I go into the lounge and wait.
About ten minutes later a very good-looking petite young lady walks into the lounge and asks for me. She introduces herself as Dr, O’Hara. “Let me explain what we are going to do. I’m going to numb the area with a local, and cut the thing off. The complications could be infection and bleeding. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Sign here.”
Whatever, all I know is that this very good looking young lady, nice body and about 5’ tall, with the cutest little accent, and she is my doctor, nothing else matters, so I’ll risk it. I’m thinking, what’s the worst that could happen, I bleed to death or get an infection and die.” No problem, I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. So I sign the consent form.
We walk across the hall to a small room. In the room, there’s a not too bad looking nurse, somewhat older than Dr. Cutie, but still younger than me. She takes my blood pressure and such. The cute little doctor finishes setting up, turns and asks me to take off my pants. (I am never one to refuse any woman that asks be to get nekkid. Modesty be damned, off with the pants and briefs, jockey style, and I lay down on the table.
Now it dawns on me that I am naked from the waist down, in front of two women I don’t know, but that doesn’t bother me at all. But I do wonder what they’ll think when they look at “IT”. I don’t really want to know, so I tare at the ceiling so can’t see their face. I really don’t want to know if they laughing at “IT” or not.
Dr. Cutie tells me to spread my legs so she can take a look. I comply, giving here a full view. (Now here is where the touching starts) She lifts my balls out of the way and I hear the nurse and her discussing the process, you know medical shit and stuff.
Now Dr. Cutie removes her hand from my balls and asks the nurse to hold them out of the way. The nurse grabs them, but in a very different way. A way where her hand is laying right on my dick. O’boy, now a woman has got the whole package in her hand and her hand is on my dick, well most of it, there was a little over flow if you get my drift.
The nurse says, “This is going to be cold and wet.”
I look to the side and see Dr. Cutie take a clamp with some gauge pads dipped in that brown liquid that sanitizes shit. I feel her rubbing the area under my balls. She was right, it is cold and wet, but it also feels kind of good. She does it again. Felt good again.
Now I start thinking. I have one woman holding my package in her hand and the other rubbing me, an erection would not be good at this time. That thought quickly passed, because now I see Dr. Dominatrix holding up this rather large syringe, with a needle about three inches long. Then I see the nurse holding a bottle of stuff. (Point of information here, all sexual related thoughts, and my fear of getting an erection, just left my mind)
“Couldn’t you find a bigger needle?” I said.
They both laugh the kind of laugh, the kind of laugh evil people have when the torture is about to begin.
“Oh, that whole thing won’t be going in you, just the tip, but it's going to sting, A LOT!”
WTF does a lot mean? Now I’m starting to get worried, but keep my cool.
“I’m going to numb you and you’ll feel a burning sensation.” Dr. Dominatrix says. Bam, the evil doctor plunges the spike into me. I jump a little.
“You alright?” she says.
“I’m, uh, fine.” (Like hell, it burns like a motherfucker)
“Are you sure? You seem to be clinching your hands awfully tight.”
“No, I’m fine.” I say as all sensation leaves my hands from gripping them so tighly.
“Okay. I one more.” Bam! The evil Dr. Dominatrix plunges the spike into me once more.
Now I’m thinking, is there no mercy for a poor veteran of a war? Haven’t I been through enough? Why me, oh why me?
“You okay?”
“Oooooooo, I’m fine.” I say as my breathing rapidly increases. This fucking hurts. Sting a little my ass.
The stabbing, burning pain subsides in a minute or so, and I feel Dr. Evil rummaging around down there. All I feel at this point is pressure sensations where the cutting must be going on by now. Nothing hurts, which is good as far as I’m concerned, so I relax and breath normally once again. My pulse decreases to just slightly above normal, for a rat that is.
Then I smelled something burning. The smell of hair burning, in addition to the smell of burning human flesh .
I’m thinking WTF are they doing now, branding me with Dr. Evil’s initials like they do with fucking cattle out west. WTF are they doing?
“What’s burning?” I calmly ask.
“You.” the sadistic nurse replies with an evil sounding cackle.
Dr. Evil giggles, and says, “Maybe you could have phrased that a little different so the patient doesn’t get upset?”
Now I’m thinking, upset, who me? Why the fuck would I be upset? Why? You lull me into a false sense of security with your hot little body and cute accent, and then plunge sharp objects that burn like hell into me, and now you’re branding me very close to the most sensitive parts of my body like they do to with cattle. Why should I get upset?
I say in calm voice so as not to get Dr. Evil nervous and cause her to slip with the branding iron and burn my dick, “No, I’m not upset, but what are you doing?”
“There’s some bleeding that won’t stop, so we are corterizing it to try and stop it.”
Try, WTF do you mean try? Make it stop! Your a fucking doctor, right? Get the bleeding to fucking stop. Oh great, now here’s where I bleed to death just like Dr. Evil warned me could happen. So that’s why she forced me to sign my life away, the evil bitch. Why oh why did I listen to her, why?
“I think we got it? The evil doctor says. "It’s just oozing a little. But it should stop soon. If it doesn’t, just come back in to the Emergency Room and we’ll corterize it again.”
WTF do you mean you THINK you got it? I can see it all now, I leave here, oozing blood from my vast wound. The bleeding doesn’t stop, so I have to turn around and make the 45 minute drive back, and all the while I’m getting weaker and weaker from lose of blood. Then I pass out from the loss of blood and crash into an overpass imbuttment and die. Great, it happened just as you planned you evil, evil bitch.
“What do you think we should cover it with?” Dr Evil says. The evil doctor mentions something about a band-aid but the equally evil nurse says it’s not a good idea.
WTF, don't you two have a clue WTF you are doing? Ask what to do next? Didn't you plan the out? I know, you want me to bleed to death, right? Don’t either if you fucking care if I live or die? You bitches are so fucking evil.
“That one has a lot of adhesive around it” the evil nurse says, “It won’t be pleasant when he removes it. It will pull out a lot of hair and be painful.”
The sharp mind that I have remembers my blog entry about the Brazilian Wax a few entries back. “Yeah like a Brazilian Wax job.” I say.
Dr. Evil laughs, but the nurse doesn’t know what I mean, so she asks what a Brazilian Wax job is. The doctor explains it to her, but I also jump in and briefly describe the contents of my blog entry. The nurse says no way she is going to have that done. The doctor tells her you get used to it.
That was all I needed to jolt me back to reality, talking to two chicks about waxing their privates. I remembered the flash video with the waxer standing over the waxee, ripping out pubes and ass hair. I put myself into the place of the waxer and all of a sudden, Dr. Evil Dominatrix is transformed back into Dr. Cutie. I picture Dr. Cutie being the waxee in the flash video. She’s nekkid from the waist down and I can picture me ripping her pubes from her body.
“Jab me with fucking sharp objects will you bitch? Burn me with a branding iron will you?” the evil Doctor BTExpress says. “Take off your pants, right now bitch, and get up on the table. Okay, spread them so I can get a good look. Ha, ha, now it’s my turn to torture you.
"This may hurt a little, as I rip out your pubs in large clumps, but live with it.”
”Ha, ha, ha!!! Shut up bitch, revenge is sweet my dear, revenge is sweet. Ha, ha, ha!!!”, says the evil Doctor BTExpress.
No, I wasn’t cheating on my wife, I was having a polyp removed from between my ass and balls. During the initial examination and procedure, they had to move my package to get to the polyp, but they still touched it, so it still counts, right?
I had a doctor’s appointment at the local VA Hospital to have this little thing removed from between my legs and it just so happens, that both the doctor and nurse were women. As far as that goes, the doctor I saw last week who diagnosed it, was also a young lady. She was a resident from a local university. They come to the VA Hospital once a week to help out.
I go into the hospital yesterday and go up to Unit 23. The guy at the desk tells me to sit in the Patient Lounge and someone will come and get me. I go into the lounge and wait.
About ten minutes later a very good-looking petite young lady walks into the lounge and asks for me. She introduces herself as Dr, O’Hara. “Let me explain what we are going to do. I’m going to numb the area with a local, and cut the thing off. The complications could be infection and bleeding. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Sign here.”
Whatever, all I know is that this very good looking young lady, nice body and about 5’ tall, with the cutest little accent, and she is my doctor, nothing else matters, so I’ll risk it. I’m thinking, what’s the worst that could happen, I bleed to death or get an infection and die.” No problem, I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. So I sign the consent form.
We walk across the hall to a small room. In the room, there’s a not too bad looking nurse, somewhat older than Dr. Cutie, but still younger than me. She takes my blood pressure and such. The cute little doctor finishes setting up, turns and asks me to take off my pants. (I am never one to refuse any woman that asks be to get nekkid. Modesty be damned, off with the pants and briefs, jockey style, and I lay down on the table.
Now it dawns on me that I am naked from the waist down, in front of two women I don’t know, but that doesn’t bother me at all. But I do wonder what they’ll think when they look at “IT”. I don’t really want to know, so I tare at the ceiling so can’t see their face. I really don’t want to know if they laughing at “IT” or not.
Dr. Cutie tells me to spread my legs so she can take a look. I comply, giving here a full view. (Now here is where the touching starts) She lifts my balls out of the way and I hear the nurse and her discussing the process, you know medical shit and stuff.
Now Dr. Cutie removes her hand from my balls and asks the nurse to hold them out of the way. The nurse grabs them, but in a very different way. A way where her hand is laying right on my dick. O’boy, now a woman has got the whole package in her hand and her hand is on my dick, well most of it, there was a little over flow if you get my drift.
The nurse says, “This is going to be cold and wet.”
I look to the side and see Dr. Cutie take a clamp with some gauge pads dipped in that brown liquid that sanitizes shit. I feel her rubbing the area under my balls. She was right, it is cold and wet, but it also feels kind of good. She does it again. Felt good again.
Now I start thinking. I have one woman holding my package in her hand and the other rubbing me, an erection would not be good at this time. That thought quickly passed, because now I see Dr. Dominatrix holding up this rather large syringe, with a needle about three inches long. Then I see the nurse holding a bottle of stuff. (Point of information here, all sexual related thoughts, and my fear of getting an erection, just left my mind)
“Couldn’t you find a bigger needle?” I said.
They both laugh the kind of laugh, the kind of laugh evil people have when the torture is about to begin.
“Oh, that whole thing won’t be going in you, just the tip, but it's going to sting, A LOT!”
WTF does a lot mean? Now I’m starting to get worried, but keep my cool.
“I’m going to numb you and you’ll feel a burning sensation.” Dr. Dominatrix says. Bam, the evil doctor plunges the spike into me. I jump a little.
“You alright?” she says.
“I’m, uh, fine.” (Like hell, it burns like a motherfucker)
“Are you sure? You seem to be clinching your hands awfully tight.”
“No, I’m fine.” I say as all sensation leaves my hands from gripping them so tighly.
“Okay. I one more.” Bam! The evil Dr. Dominatrix plunges the spike into me once more.
Now I’m thinking, is there no mercy for a poor veteran of a war? Haven’t I been through enough? Why me, oh why me?
“You okay?”
“Oooooooo, I’m fine.” I say as my breathing rapidly increases. This fucking hurts. Sting a little my ass.
The stabbing, burning pain subsides in a minute or so, and I feel Dr. Evil rummaging around down there. All I feel at this point is pressure sensations where the cutting must be going on by now. Nothing hurts, which is good as far as I’m concerned, so I relax and breath normally once again. My pulse decreases to just slightly above normal, for a rat that is.
Then I smelled something burning. The smell of hair burning, in addition to the smell of burning human flesh .
I’m thinking WTF are they doing now, branding me with Dr. Evil’s initials like they do with fucking cattle out west. WTF are they doing?
“What’s burning?” I calmly ask.
“You.” the sadistic nurse replies with an evil sounding cackle.
Dr. Evil giggles, and says, “Maybe you could have phrased that a little different so the patient doesn’t get upset?”
Now I’m thinking, upset, who me? Why the fuck would I be upset? Why? You lull me into a false sense of security with your hot little body and cute accent, and then plunge sharp objects that burn like hell into me, and now you’re branding me very close to the most sensitive parts of my body like they do to with cattle. Why should I get upset?
I say in calm voice so as not to get Dr. Evil nervous and cause her to slip with the branding iron and burn my dick, “No, I’m not upset, but what are you doing?”
“There’s some bleeding that won’t stop, so we are corterizing it to try and stop it.”
Try, WTF do you mean try? Make it stop! Your a fucking doctor, right? Get the bleeding to fucking stop. Oh great, now here’s where I bleed to death just like Dr. Evil warned me could happen. So that’s why she forced me to sign my life away, the evil bitch. Why oh why did I listen to her, why?
“I think we got it? The evil doctor says. "It’s just oozing a little. But it should stop soon. If it doesn’t, just come back in to the Emergency Room and we’ll corterize it again.”
WTF do you mean you THINK you got it? I can see it all now, I leave here, oozing blood from my vast wound. The bleeding doesn’t stop, so I have to turn around and make the 45 minute drive back, and all the while I’m getting weaker and weaker from lose of blood. Then I pass out from the loss of blood and crash into an overpass imbuttment and die. Great, it happened just as you planned you evil, evil bitch.
“What do you think we should cover it with?” Dr Evil says. The evil doctor mentions something about a band-aid but the equally evil nurse says it’s not a good idea.
WTF, don't you two have a clue WTF you are doing? Ask what to do next? Didn't you plan the out? I know, you want me to bleed to death, right? Don’t either if you fucking care if I live or die? You bitches are so fucking evil.
“That one has a lot of adhesive around it” the evil nurse says, “It won’t be pleasant when he removes it. It will pull out a lot of hair and be painful.”
The sharp mind that I have remembers my blog entry about the Brazilian Wax a few entries back. “Yeah like a Brazilian Wax job.” I say.
Dr. Evil laughs, but the nurse doesn’t know what I mean, so she asks what a Brazilian Wax job is. The doctor explains it to her, but I also jump in and briefly describe the contents of my blog entry. The nurse says no way she is going to have that done. The doctor tells her you get used to it.
That was all I needed to jolt me back to reality, talking to two chicks about waxing their privates. I remembered the flash video with the waxer standing over the waxee, ripping out pubes and ass hair. I put myself into the place of the waxer and all of a sudden, Dr. Evil Dominatrix is transformed back into Dr. Cutie. I picture Dr. Cutie being the waxee in the flash video. She’s nekkid from the waist down and I can picture me ripping her pubes from her body.
“Jab me with fucking sharp objects will you bitch? Burn me with a branding iron will you?” the evil Doctor BTExpress says. “Take off your pants, right now bitch, and get up on the table. Okay, spread them so I can get a good look. Ha, ha, now it’s my turn to torture you.
"This may hurt a little, as I rip out your pubs in large clumps, but live with it.”
”Ha, ha, ha!!! Shut up bitch, revenge is sweet my dear, revenge is sweet. Ha, ha, ha!!!”, says the evil Doctor BTExpress.
21 August 2005 @ 04:03 pm
The Date: It was 1968, I think it was July, but maybe August, but do you really care?
The Age: 19 years old
The Place: Good Old Columbia South Carolina
The Reason for Being in That Shit Hole: I was in the US Army learning to be an Infantryman. Yep, I was drafted in May of that year, destined to be just another poor grunt to get shot in Vietnam, or in my case blown up. But that’s another story.
Basic training at Fort Jackson was very restrictive, but once that was over, we were all sent to AIT (Advanced Individual Training) to learn the job we would do for the next two years. I was selected to be a sacrificial lamb and train as a grunt, i.e., infantryman, so I didn’t leave Fort Jackson. I was just sent to another part of the base.
While I was in AIT, most weekends I was off and pretty much free to do what I wanted. I usually choose to spend my weekends in downtown Columbia, South Carolina, if I had any money.
When we went into Columbia, I always checked into the same crappy hotel, because it was the cheapest. I drank beer in the cheapest bars and occasionally ate somewhere, also cheap. That was pretty much all I ever did until the night I lost my virginity.
I was in Columbia that weekend, drinking and occasionally eating, like I always did, and was with one of my friends, I’ve long ago forgotten his name, but that’s not important. We just left one of the seedy bars we always frequented, and were on our way back to the hotel, when my friend spotted two girls. One was pretty good looking with a nice body, and one a little not so nice looking, and on the heavy side. I’ll give you one guess, which one I eventually wound up with.
My friend walks over to the girls, talks to them for a half a minute and then comes back over to me. He tells me he wants to hook up with these ladies, but it will cost us each $15.
Let me tell you, I don’t want to do this, no fucking way. I’d only had two girlfriends in my entire life up to that point, and I’d never even got past touching one of the girl’s boobs, over her clothes. Now he is crazy if he thinks I am going to jump ahead to actual fucking. Not on his ever loving life. The thought of fucking one of those girls scared the shit out of me. I couldn’t believe that he actually wanted me, a virgin’s virgin, to actually screw some strange girl he saw on the street. I had to make up an excuse to get out of this.
“I don’t have enough money, I only have $3.”
“That’s okay, I have money. Let me see how much I have.”
“Okay. I got $21.”
“That’s not enough,” relieved that we were short the cash.
“But with your $3, and my $21, that makes $24. Let’s see if they’ll take it. I’ll loan you the difference.”
“I’m not going to owe you money for this. Let’s just get out of here.”
“Okay, I’ll give you the money. You won’t owe me.”
“Let’s leave and go get some more beers.”
“What’s the matter? Haven’t you ever had sex before?”
“Sure I have, plenty of times.”
“So then, what’s the problem?”
Son-of-a-bitch, he played the “Virgin” card on me. Damn, I couldn’t tell him I was a virgin, now could I?
“No problem, see if they’ll take it.” I say.
I prayed they turned him down, but just my luck, they agreed to the price. We walked back to their place. It wasn’t that far, just a short walk outside of town. We get to their place, a house with a porch and no front door, no shit, no front door. We walk in and one of the girls walks up to this guy and talks to him. The other girl walks over to bathroom and sits down to pee. No door on that room either. I remember thinking I can’t believe she is peeing right in front of everyone.
Well, she gets done peeing and all four of us walk into this room. It has one bed. My friend and his girl get on the bed, take off their clothes and start fucking. There is no room for the four of us on the bed, so the girl I’m with lays down on the floor fully clothed and lifts her skirt. She refuses to take off her clothes.
I look down and "it" is right there, staring me in the face. The biggest, hairiest muff I'd ever seen. Not that I'd seen any muffs up to that point, but now that I've seen a few in my days, it really was the biggest and hairiest I was ever going to see. I drop my pants, get down on the floor between her legs, and for some unknown reason, I’m thinking a miracle at that point, I find my way to home base, first shot. I start doing my thing. Then as soon as I started, I cum, but I don’t loose a stroke. I just keep going and going, you know, like the Energizer Bunny, just like nothing happened.
I didn’t pay $12, well, $3, for this shit to end in a minute-30, so I’m getting my money’s worth out of this. I figure I’ll just going to keep going until she makes me stop. No sooner as that thought crossed my mind, she says,
“You done yet?”
“No, not yet.”
“Hurry up.”
I don’t say a word and just keep fucking. Next thing I know, there’s a knock on the door. She pushes me off and says times up. My friend’s girl pushes him off, and jumps off the bed and gets dressed. I pull up my pants and my friend gets dressed complaining about how fast that was, the whole time. The door opens and this guy says, “Times up. Now you two get out of here.” My friend shuts up. This whole adventure couldn’t have been more than 5 minutes, tops.
We go out into the hall and run into two guys we were in AIT with. They tell us things don’t look good, and we better get out of here quick, before we get our asses kicked. Now I have no idea what is going on, but being a white guy, in a black neighborhood, in the deep south in 1968, and being told things don’t look good, sets me running out the front door as fast as I could. The four of us took off together. We stuck to the back yards, hopping fences and hiding in bushes all the way back into town. I never looked backed.
Well, nobody followed us and we made it back to our hotel rooms in one piece. We were all safe and sound in those sleazy hotels in downtown Columbia South Carolina. The next morning I woke up alive, and caught the bus back to the base ready for my next adventure in Good Old Columbia South Carolina.
The Place: Good Old Columbia South Carolina
The Reason for Being in That Shit Hole: I was in the US Army learning to be an Infantryman. Yep, I was drafted in May of that year, destined to be just another poor grunt to get shot in Vietnam, or in my case blown up. But that’s another story.
Basic training at Fort Jackson was very restrictive, but once that was over, we were all sent to AIT (Advanced Individual Training) to learn the job we would do for the next two years. I was selected to be a sacrificial lamb and train as a grunt, i.e., infantryman, so I didn’t leave Fort Jackson. I was just sent to another part of the base.
While I was in AIT, most weekends I was off and pretty much free to do what I wanted. I usually choose to spend my weekends in downtown Columbia, South Carolina, if I had any money.
When we went into Columbia, I always checked into the same crappy hotel, because it was the cheapest. I drank beer in the cheapest bars and occasionally ate somewhere, also cheap. That was pretty much all I ever did until the night I lost my virginity.
I was in Columbia that weekend, drinking and occasionally eating, like I always did, and was with one of my friends, I’ve long ago forgotten his name, but that’s not important. We just left one of the seedy bars we always frequented, and were on our way back to the hotel, when my friend spotted two girls. One was pretty good looking with a nice body, and one a little not so nice looking, and on the heavy side. I’ll give you one guess, which one I eventually wound up with.
My friend walks over to the girls, talks to them for a half a minute and then comes back over to me. He tells me he wants to hook up with these ladies, but it will cost us each $15.
Let me tell you, I don’t want to do this, no fucking way. I’d only had two girlfriends in my entire life up to that point, and I’d never even got past touching one of the girl’s boobs, over her clothes. Now he is crazy if he thinks I am going to jump ahead to actual fucking. Not on his ever loving life. The thought of fucking one of those girls scared the shit out of me. I couldn’t believe that he actually wanted me, a virgin’s virgin, to actually screw some strange girl he saw on the street. I had to make up an excuse to get out of this.
“I don’t have enough money, I only have $3.”
“That’s okay, I have money. Let me see how much I have.”
“Okay. I got $21.”
“That’s not enough,” relieved that we were short the cash.
“But with your $3, and my $21, that makes $24. Let’s see if they’ll take it. I’ll loan you the difference.”
“I’m not going to owe you money for this. Let’s just get out of here.”
“Okay, I’ll give you the money. You won’t owe me.”
“Let’s leave and go get some more beers.”
“What’s the matter? Haven’t you ever had sex before?”
“Sure I have, plenty of times.”
“So then, what’s the problem?”
Son-of-a-bitch, he played the “Virgin” card on me. Damn, I couldn’t tell him I was a virgin, now could I?
“No problem, see if they’ll take it.” I say.
I prayed they turned him down, but just my luck, they agreed to the price. We walked back to their place. It wasn’t that far, just a short walk outside of town. We get to their place, a house with a porch and no front door, no shit, no front door. We walk in and one of the girls walks up to this guy and talks to him. The other girl walks over to bathroom and sits down to pee. No door on that room either. I remember thinking I can’t believe she is peeing right in front of everyone.
Well, she gets done peeing and all four of us walk into this room. It has one bed. My friend and his girl get on the bed, take off their clothes and start fucking. There is no room for the four of us on the bed, so the girl I’m with lays down on the floor fully clothed and lifts her skirt. She refuses to take off her clothes.
I look down and "it" is right there, staring me in the face. The biggest, hairiest muff I'd ever seen. Not that I'd seen any muffs up to that point, but now that I've seen a few in my days, it really was the biggest and hairiest I was ever going to see. I drop my pants, get down on the floor between her legs, and for some unknown reason, I’m thinking a miracle at that point, I find my way to home base, first shot. I start doing my thing. Then as soon as I started, I cum, but I don’t loose a stroke. I just keep going and going, you know, like the Energizer Bunny, just like nothing happened.
I didn’t pay $12, well, $3, for this shit to end in a minute-30, so I’m getting my money’s worth out of this. I figure I’ll just going to keep going until she makes me stop. No sooner as that thought crossed my mind, she says,
“You done yet?”
“No, not yet.”
“Hurry up.”
I don’t say a word and just keep fucking. Next thing I know, there’s a knock on the door. She pushes me off and says times up. My friend’s girl pushes him off, and jumps off the bed and gets dressed. I pull up my pants and my friend gets dressed complaining about how fast that was, the whole time. The door opens and this guy says, “Times up. Now you two get out of here.” My friend shuts up. This whole adventure couldn’t have been more than 5 minutes, tops.
We go out into the hall and run into two guys we were in AIT with. They tell us things don’t look good, and we better get out of here quick, before we get our asses kicked. Now I have no idea what is going on, but being a white guy, in a black neighborhood, in the deep south in 1968, and being told things don’t look good, sets me running out the front door as fast as I could. The four of us took off together. We stuck to the back yards, hopping fences and hiding in bushes all the way back into town. I never looked backed.
Well, nobody followed us and we made it back to our hotel rooms in one piece. We were all safe and sound in those sleazy hotels in downtown Columbia South Carolina. The next morning I woke up alive, and caught the bus back to the base ready for my next adventure in Good Old Columbia South Carolina.
17 August 2005 @ 03:17 am
...when you go into the bathroom you hardly ever use, and haven't been in for at least a week, and see the water dripping fairly fast, and when you turn it off, realize it's the hot water that's been dripping for who knows how long?
COME ON PEOPLE!!!! HOT WATER TAKES PROPANE TO MAKE IT HOT, AND F**KING PROPANE IS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN F**KING GASOLINE RIGHT NOW!!!! WAKE THE FUCK UP, AND SHUT THE F**KING FAUCET OFF ALL THE WAY, WHEN YOU ARE DONE WASHING UP!!!! F**KING MONEY DOESN'T GROW ON F**KING TREES!!!!
Thank you,
The One Who Pays the f**cking bills
PS
I feel so much better now, thanks for listening.
COME ON PEOPLE!!!! HOT WATER TAKES PROPANE TO MAKE IT HOT, AND F**KING PROPANE IS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN F**KING GASOLINE RIGHT NOW!!!! WAKE THE FUCK UP, AND SHUT THE F**KING FAUCET OFF ALL THE WAY, WHEN YOU ARE DONE WASHING UP!!!! F**KING MONEY DOESN'T GROW ON F**KING TREES!!!!
Thank you,
The One Who Pays the f**cking bills
PS
I feel so much better now, thanks for listening.
15 July 2005 @ 09:17 pm
I decided to provide the link to my other blog, as keeping up two is a little too much right now. If your interested, it's also named "BTExpress". I'd like the company if you have time.
Edit: I changed my mind and decided to post here too. It's not only women that get to change their mind you know.
Edit: I changed my mind and decided to post here too. It's not only women that get to change their mind you know.
03 July 2005 @ 07:10 pm
I was born in Pennsylvania and grew up in Florida. I lived there until
9th grade when my mother sent me to live with my father and stepmother
on Long Island. I graduated high school in 1966 and was drafted in
1968.
Off to Vietnam in October and wounded about a month later, four days
after my 20th birthday. I had an out of body experience when I was
wounded and saw myself lying dead on the ground. Interesting experience
dieing.
I spent three months in various military hospitals recovering and then
off to Fort Meade in Maryland for the remainder of my two years. I was
honorably discharged in May 1970.
I met my wife to be on Labor Day weekend that year. Barbara and I were married
about two years later in July 1972. We had a boy
in April 1982 and named him Brian. He turned 23 this past April.
Life was pretty good for us up until May 2003. That is when they
discovered Barbara had malignant brain cancer. They originally
estimated she could survive between two months and two years, but not
to expect anything more. She passed away on October 17, 2005. I miss her a great deal. God rest her soul.
01 July 2005 @ 11:28 pm